On contradiction. And crankiness

A short while ago, my company had their first annual Health Fair, which was basically a week full of barely qualified "experts" telling you a bunch of shit you already know about not smoking, watching your diet, and getting exercise. But it was a lot of shit; pretty comprehensive, VERY heavy-handed, like here-are-some-grapes-get-off-your-fat-ass-already type stuff. Right. Behold the email that went out from HR yesterday:

FYI - We are doing a special tailgate theme menu for Friday's "Fly Eagle's Fly"
employee lunch:

Spicy Buffalo Wings
Nacho Chips & Salsa Dip
Roasted Veggy Quesadillas
Grilled Sweet Sausages & Peppers
Ropa Vieja (Cuban shredded beef sandwiches)
Conshohocken Steak
Rolls
Dill Pickles & Hot Cherry Peppers
Fiesta Seven Layer Salad

Honestly. Not even a damn side salad (the "fiesta" salad was pretty much a bowl full of sour cream & beans with maybe a fine mist of wilted lettuce). Picking my way through that calorie land mine was next to impossible. I had some pickles, a couple of spoonfuls of salsa, half a quesadilla slice and a link of sausage. It cost me 12 goddamn points and I'm still fucking starving.

As an aside ... my hatred for the fucking Eagles, seriously, has never known such depth. If I hear that fucking song one more time, I'm taking out a fucking elementary school. See if I don't. Come Sunday, The Cardinals better own them like gimps in Turkish prison.